Thursday, January 17, 2013

Rotten Punany



Rotten Punany




My femininity has betrayed me.
My most scared spot has lost my trust. My vagina has failed me as a woman.

You were the only thing I trusted on my body.
My mind couldn’t make up its own mind.
My heart would lie to me, skipping
A beat every time he was near.
But you, you never guided me in the wrong way until
That day.

It wasn’t how I envisioned my first time.
He held me down and I knew what he wanted.
I didn’t want him touching you.
You were so sacred to me and
I was so happy to have held on to you for this long.

He grabbed you and you responded.
I wasn’t prepared for it.
I didn’t know what to do.
I cried harder I couldn’t stop shaking
But you still didn’t stop.
You got getter
And he thought I wanted it.

All because you turned him on.
It’s your fault
And I will always hate you for it.

He hurt me so bad you don’t even
Care.
You sat there and did not while he
Used you.

I can’t trust you anymore
I hate the way you look
I hate the way you feel
Your smell repulses me
You reek of putrid meat.

I just wish you would go away
And never come back.
Someone else can have you now.
You’re too used for me to touch
Again.

©Golden Rays

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Life Savior



Life Savior





I couldn’t cry
I tasted pain in the
Tears
That were filling
My eyes.
I blinked twice.
Trying to hold
Back the
Hurt that was just
So desperately
Trying to run outside of
My soul.
It hurts.
Letting it go
Is the most painful
Feeling I have ever
Felt.
It’s the reality
That nothing will
Be the same
Again.
The emotions, feelings
The sadness
Nights pent crying
In the bathroom
Praying no one
Can hear my shame
Secretly hoping
Someone….
Anyone come save me
Because
I just don’t have the
Energy anymore
To even attempt to save
Myself.

©Golden Rays

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Attitude



Attitude



Little girl switching your hips.
Don’t you know that’s where all your trouble lies?

We don’t envy the way you walk.
We aren’t jealous of the shake in your thighs,
The size of your ass
Or the smell of fresh meat scent you try to
Hide.

We fear for you
We were once you.

Naïve to the reality of the monster under the bed
That you try to hide.
So you sleep with every fine boy out there
Trying to make up for your first time.

The way he held you down as you shouted
No
Watching your Cinderella underwear hit the floor,
Mommy never came running.

We know about the on you couldn’t leave so you decide to
Stay.
Along with that cut on the left side of your face
That you keep covered up with foundation
That does no justice to your beautiful
Soul.

Little girl we see the sadness in your eyes.
As no one understands you like we do.
After all, we did give birth to
You.

We watched you crawl into the hole and die.
And what was the only thing we did?

We rolled our eyes.

©Golden Rays

Monday, January 14, 2013

Ejaculatory Death



Ejaculatory Death




I died that day
With his semen in my mouth
Choking on lost dreams,
Innocent and that
Happily ever after
Fairy tale ending.

Forced to sallow his
Kids.
Taking away the thoughts
Of raising my own
Without the fear of
History repeating itself.

Holding my head on his dick I saw my life
Flash before my eyes.

Waking up drowning
In cum I scrub my skin until it’s
Raw.
All I can feel is dried up
Shame
That can’t be cleansed.

With everyone blaming me, I feel guilty for not listening.
I’m too tired to even talk about death anymore


©Golden Rays

Sunday, January 13, 2013

The Crucifixion of the Black Woman



The Crucifixion of the Black Woman





They hung me to the cross
Every so gently taking a
Bloody nail and hammered
It into my hand.
My ankles are together
Wrapped in the purest
Silk.

Careful not to scar my
Honey Carmel skin
I’m hosted up on
Display for the world
To see.

The line can be seen
For miles.
With no end in sight
I close my eyes
And holding to
Nothing.

My skin glistening
With sweaty palms
Lips forced apart
Tearing into my
Soul
Each push
Each thrust
Each ejaculation of
Hate and anger.

My spirit dies
They wait their turn, patiently
Amazed at
My strength, questioning
If I can even be broken.

I can’t hear the whispers
The snickering echoes in my mind
Constantly
Replaying each touch
Their smell embedded
Into my skin
Soap won’t do me
Justice.

They won’t let me go
Won’t end my
Misery
They won’t put an end to my
Suffering.

Over and over
It happens while
The world stares
Everyone saw
And no one came to
Help

©Golden Rays